言葉はいらない

I should be more active.

2007-02-13T16:41:48Z

Okay.

I believe I should be more active.

Oyah.

Well, I'm going to start posting more. *GASP*

And probably writing a lot more. I might take those little theme things and do one a day or something.

All of them will be YooSu, Darwin/Ell(OMC), or whatever the hell else I come up with. Like...Shinya/DaiDai or sth.

Anywho..

Bigger and more important news.

My dog died last night. He hardly had any energy to move...He walked into the garage with my dad last night to go to bed...and he was very weak...he was walking in a diagonal line, for Christ's sake...and he almost fell over... So my dad went to check on him in the middle of the night and my dog walked up to him and settled not too far away from him. This morning I asked my dad to go check on him. If Reoux died, I didn't want to be the first to see him. I knew he was dead. He had to be after his condition last night...

'Lo and behold..my father walks back in and tells me: "He died last night. He's in the same position he was in when I left him." His eyes were opened. He was stretched out. He looked like he was resting...just not breathing.

I'm glad he's dead, actually. He was in great pain and it's better that he had died peacefully last night. It makes me happy that after those hellish weeks, he was given mercy.

We tried bringing him inside...maybe he was just tired. But we all knew he wasn't. He wouldn't come in the house. He knew that I would bring him to my room, lift him into my bed, and let him fall asleep curled up against my shin. He wouldn't budge. He came to the door, walking in a wavy line and almost toppling over, ribs showing through his skin because he refused to eat, and licked my hand before turning around and walking away with my father. He said goodbye and that made me cry right there. I knew he'd be gone before morning.

This morning my father brought him to the Humane Society so they can put his body in a proper place. And my dad couldn't bear to take the dog's chain. He wanted to leave Reoux as he was. I wish I had his little green tag, yanno? The one dad ground Reoux's name into with a Dremel.

If I should ever get another dog, I want the exact same breed. I want a superblack black lab. Smaller breed.

We'll raise him to be sweet as hell, just as Reoux was. And as I'm writing this, I can't help but start to cry again.

He was my little brother and my child, my protector and the protected.

God, I miss him.

Karmic Hell and Crackling Wallpaper

2007-02-13T04:29:37Z

Title: Karmic Hell and Crackling Wallpaper
Writer:...Me. >__>
Pairing: YooSu.
A/N: Kristi. This is all your fault. XP.....8DDDD

It's one of those days where you sit up in bed and stare at the crackling wallpaper.

One of those days where you look out a grimy window onto the cement-patched black asphalt-paved street and wonder for the first time of many that day - "Why have I not killed myself yet?"

It's a day where the day is cold. The air is a visible veil of gray over all you can see and it s l o w l y but surely is killing you from the inside out, all of the wisps of red smoke in your veins and moving tendrils of life that used to flare around you just stop.

Your head turns to the body next to you. It's Junsu.

Glorious Junsu that seems unaffected by the smoggy air, the dingy windows, or the disgusting cracked streets. The chills that run down your spine as a cold blast of air surges through the drafty house don't even dare touch him. He just sleeps peacefully, all blond hair and brown eyes and pink lips covered by the duvet and multiple layers of blankets you insisted on getting with the last bit of your money, giving the money for your share of food for the week up in order to keep him warm and healthy...As healthy as could be expected, at least.

When that little angel turns over and looks up at you with sleepy brown eyes, it's game over.

He's going to warm your heart. Convincing you that maybe...just maybe...the karmic hell known as life isn't such a bitch, that he's the reason you're still alive, that you've actually done something right for once.

He'll stand by you in the coldest of days, darkest of hours, loneliest of nights.

In the bright light of the sunrise, dusky brilliance of the sunset, and the cold of the drafty one-room house you share.

It's that love. That warmth. That wonderful feeling.

It's that cold. That desperate feeling you get in the pit of your stomach as you sit up in bed and watch him sleep peacefully. The paranoia you feel when he coughs in his sleep.

It's warm this morning.

The blankets are messed up, strewn across the bed haphazardly as Junsu sleeps with his arms bent at an awkward angle. Your fingers move to his jaw and stay there for a moment, taking in the feathery softness of his skin.

Surely karmic hell can't take that from you. Right?

You ease yourself back under the covers, trying to be as quiet as possible. The springs aren't friendly with their ability to wake up Junsu and your arms wrap around Junsu's middle, resting your head with the unblinking eyes atop his.

"YooChun-ah," Junsu mumurs as he wraps his arms around your body, driving out the chill of your drafty home.

R i g h t.

Oke. Leave me comments. :>

anti_war_song @ 2007-02-06T21:44:00

2007-02-07T03:45:10Z

Um. Yeah.

I'm alive?

UGHHHHH I am so dead.

This weekend sorta sucked. Well...not sorta. Majorly sucked.

I worked on Sat. from 7 P.M. to 3 A.M. and got breakfast, then went to bed at five. Woke up at ten. Left at twelve. Worked from 2 P.M. to 3 A.M. Got home at six. Slept until 4:45 P.M. And now I'm here.

I've started writing a Smokin' Aces fanfic.

Darwin Tremor/OMC.

Harharharharhar I love Neo-Nazi hillbillies with bright blue eyes and undercuts.

a;dflkasjd;flaksd <3

PICTURE TIME :3

http://imdb.com/gallery/ss/0475394/29_D10_cmyk.jpg.html

All the way on the left...:
Here

All the way on the right...:
Here

All the way on the left...:
Here

Oke.

I'm totally obsessed with Darwin Tremor of the Tremor Brothers in Smokin' Aces. They're a group of three brothers, all Neo-Nazi hillbillies with tattoos, mohawks, and undercuts. In the trailer, you see Jeeves Tremor drawing Hitler's mustache on his upper lip with a permanent marker.

And totally ignore the ratings that are given - (one star in my area)they don't mean jack.

So, yeah. Darwin Tremor is played by Chris Pine. Look him up on IMDB if you don't know what he looks like in total-hotness mode...well...I think that Darwin's hot as it is...but I hate the nasty teeth.

That's why in the fic, I made him get extensive dental surgery.

So far, I've got one of my OMC's in as another hit-man. And...Well...yeah. No more.

WOOOOOO.

Nothing else. I love you all.

And Kristi...I'm soooo gonna bitch out Koreanboy. :3

Lovebirds

2006-12-30T06:05:24Z

Title: Lovebirds
Author: KC
Pairing: YooSu
Rating: G
Summary: Just a random drabble spurred on by conversation...
Author's Notes: n/a

"Lovebirds"

I didn't believe what my friends were telling me when I first heard the story of the lovebirds. When lovebirds find a mate, nine out of ten are together until death. When one dies, the other will cry and peck its own feathers out. According to veterinarians, it is depression that makes these birds go into this state, and the bird has a high chance of dying within a year.

And today you left. You went back across the country, back to your home after our holidays were spent. I can only lie on the sofa in the blanket we had wrapped around us not even seven hours earlier from now- and I swear that it still smells like you. There's no signs that you were here but your scent...and that cheap nickel machine ring that wraps around my thumb. It bothers you, I know. And there will be rust stains around our thumbs where the metal got wet from perspiration...but I can only hope that you keep it on, no matter the discomfort.

I can only hope that you had a good time with us.

And I remember when you were walking through that gate...getting ready to catch your flight back home...back where you would be for God-knows-how-long...Just that one kiss before you left.

"Junsu," you said. "I'll miss you so much..."

And you caressed my hair and wrapped your arms around my waist.

I could taste my own tears when you kissed me, and I know you could, too. The faceless bodies that walked around us could see, but I didn't care. You were going to leave soon. My spot beside you would be empty and would soon be filled by a passenger on a plane, someone that would surely annoy you until your flight is over...But I can only hope that you think of it the same way I do.

Sure...absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Absence also makes the heart ache.

I suppose that it's better that you're leaving to go home...and that you're not leaving me forever. I'd sit here. Cry my eyes out. Pull my own hair out.

I would die within a year.

-Fin

Alive? Yes..I suppose.

2006-09-16T17:56:25Z

Listening to this song makes me miss Faith No More and Mr. Bungle dearly.

And I just realized that I have indirect ties to Phil Anselmo from Pantera. Fucking amazing.

As for the reason why I haven't updated in...forever?

School pwns me. Seriously.

Pre-Calculus...I'm currently failing despite spending so much time on it. I want at least a B for my report card, though...Gotta haul ass.

Chemistry is hard, but I've got a low A.

Everything else I either have High B's (soon-to-be A's because of recently-submitted work) or A's...And I have a Pre-Calc test on Monday that I am sure to ace.

Pre-Calculus, once you get the hang of it, is fun. I actually did the homework in about a half an hour and felt so special when I checked my answers. :D

Test on Chemistry on Tuesday...(This is more of a mental note for me)

Umm...Reading The Scarlet Letter and hating it immensely....

I've turned into a neat freak. How scary?

My shitty phone has been replaced, so if you want me to put your number in it again, leave a comment.

Umm....Might be getting a scanner soon. Maybe. I'll start submitting art again...

I'm working on a poster for a contest for the RiverWalk...It's a Louisiana Rebirth thing...and I think I'm going to draw a decimated house and a person putting in a brand new window on this piece of shit house...and show someone painting off the dead-body-signals spray-painted on everyone's houses.

Intense...and hard...but if I don't finish it in time, it'll be a personal project.

It's gotta be 11x17...and I need to choke this out by either next week or the week after.

Dad has his first job with the new band this upcoming Saturday. I'll be babysitting...

They have a possible job lined up with Ole Miss doing a private party for them. I'll probably be working that. And I might work with them for the Boomtown Casino job...and I need work, just something to keep my mind off of everything.

Sorry to those I talk to online a lot with...I go away a lot, mainly because I have a lot of school shit to research and notes to get from Edline...not to mention that my Latin II course is an online course and I have to catch up with three weeks worth of work because they didn't send my login info until the other day...Thankfully my teacher told me to just finish the stuff as I go.

Song change- Faith No More - "From Out of Nowhere"

I love his voice...

I hate the old singer's voice, though...

I've found myself even more addicted to FNM lately. Gonna go get the Angel Dust album once I get a chance.

I've only commented on like...two entries from my friends over the past...month? Yeah...I sincerely apologize. I've just been too fucking busy or tired to do anything. My social life is also nonexistent.

I'll be starting PSAT and ACT prep classes on the 27th, too.

Eh..I wanna see where I stand. I haven't gotten lower than the 98th percentile in any standardized testing in my entire life. I'm not lying. I shit you not, it's the truth.

But this is the PSAT and ACT...

Totally different monster.

I remember taking the PSAT in seventh grade and getting good marks for my age, other than Math...well...simply because I hadn't learned that kind of material yet.

So, yeah...gotta cough up 125 bucks for these classes by the 22nd...luckily I have that saved up. And...*ponders*

Oh..and I'm piercing my lip again over the Christmas holidays.

I might even have the option to get it professionally done by then. I'll be getting it done with a retainer instead of a metal ring so I can hide it if the healing time carries over the holidays and so my dad won't freak. My mom wouldn't have a problem with it, though, by the sounds of it...as long as I can hide it, take care of it, and pay for it.

Song change - Faith No More - "Falling to Pieces"

Well...I'm gonna go read fanfiction while I have the chance. *sigh* *waves*

EDIT: stole this from Tay-chan

IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE,
WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, etc).
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question type the song that's playing.
5. When you go to a new question press the next button.

Opening Credits:
Guns 'N' Roses - "November Rain" (Oooookay. 0 . o)

Waking Up:
Tsunami Bomb - "Lemonade" (*dansudansu*)

Falling In Love:
Faith No More - "Ashes to Ashes" (No comment. XDDD)

Fight Song:
Dir en grey - "Child Prey" (YAY! XD)

Breaking Up:
AFI - "At a Glance"

Mental Breakdown:
Hot Hot Heat - "Dirty Mouth" (Um....no.)

Life's Okay:
Neutral Milk Hotel - "Holland, 1945" (YES!! XD)

Driving:
Orgy - "Stitches" (Makes sense...I listen to Orgy when I drive mom's car.)

Flashbacks:
Deadsy - "Cruella" (.....wtf.)

Happy Dance:
Faith No More - "Midlife Crisis"

Regretting:
Gazette - "Hana Kotoba" (O_o)

Final Battle:
Otep - "Self-Made" (Eh...fitting.)

Death Scene:
Pantera - "Primal Concrete Sledge" (HOW?!?! XD)

anti_war_song @ 2006-08-15T18:43:00

2006-08-15T23:58:20Z

Orientation is tomorrowwwww

And I officially have my Little Buddy <333

A Little Buddy is kinda like the Little Sister program...except it's the "Big Buddy," which is a junior, and a "Little Buddy," which is an eighth grader just being moved up into the high school part of Ursuline Academy.

I'm so stokeedddd >3

(I refer to her as Libby..so yeah.)

Libby is the most awesome person in her class, imho. So I got lucky and made friends with her after she told me about the anime petition that she was telling everyone to sign...and we just clicked really well. ^^

So I'm going tomorrow armed with brownies for Libby and for Kitty's birthday :3 I'm gonna have so much fun tonight...*loves baking things for other people like woah*

I COOKED ON AN ACTUAL STOVE YESTERDAY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVERRRR :D

Breakfast is <3.

And so is Meguru.

And I really like my hair right now. It's not quite what I wanted, but it still looks good. Kelly razored it so I'm happy. :D

Annnnd I'm going to be getting a new phone to replaced my cracked-screen crackwhore phone. :D

AND I HAVE "LONDON BRIDGE" BY FERGIE STUCK IN MY HEAD AND LOVING EVERY. SINGLE. MINUTE. OF. IT.

I haven't finished chapter three of WPWT and I feel reallllllyyy bad.

Yupyup...

Kitty is 16. I am envious, to say the least. I want to be sixteen. Two years closer to being able to be pierced without a parental consent form.

I'm thinking about doing my lip again. But I can't do that until Christmas holidays at least. *sigh*

I might just wait til I'm eighteen and my parents can't do anything about it...I mean...my mom is okay with it, but my dad's just a lunatic about it. He hates facial piercings with a very fiery passion.

Not gonna bother with the cartilage until I'm seventeen. That's my senior year and my parents won't object to it *shrug*

Ah, the plans I have....I'm thinking about getting a four-leaf clover tattooed on me somewhere XD that or I'd end up getting humongous butterfly wings from my shoulderblades to my hips.

Two drastically different approaches XD

A little four-leaf clover behind my ear. Sounds good. *peace sign*

I'll come up to Oregon and get Tay-chan, who WILL be a professional tattoo artist, to do it.

:D

GUHGUHGUH I WANNA VISIT TAY-CHAN AND KRISTIIIIII ;_____; They're so close and yet so far...at least they're in the same country...unlike Glenraven, who's in Switzerland....and Ellie and Yuki are in Australia....ba;lsfkajsfldkaf;d

D: I cry (under my skin) at that.

ANYWHO

Happy thoughts.

ORIENTATION! Yearbook pictures...=___=...then again....a not-so-happy thought..XD SEEING EVERYBODYYY *has missed Brindley and Lauren like woah*

kekekekekekeeeee >:3

Aaaaaaaaand.....my daddy's going to get his teeth fixed. My dad's teeth are bad...I mean...they're rotting out of his head. He never took care of them. *tsks him* He already has a bridge but he's going to get it taken out and get dentures...he just has too much damage to the teeth for him to be able to salvage anything at all. And it makes me happy that he'll be able to smile without worrying about his teeth. The man has a gorgeous smile, I swear; but he doesn't like to smile around anyone but mom or me. Close friends like Sheila...he'll smile. But everyone else, he keeps his lips tight over his teeth...but sometimes he forgets and he closes his lips over his teeth again. It makes me sad. He has one of those big, really bright smiles, yanno? I can't wait until he gets the dentures or the bridges or whatever the hell it is that he's going to get to fix them.

And it's been hurting him a lot, so it'll be all good after that...He's a diabetic and the condition of your teeth actually has a great deal to do with how the rest of your body's condition is...He's been really, really sick lately, but since he knows he can finally get them fixed (well...we're getting the money from the annuity...otherwise we wouldn't be able to), he's been a lot happier.

In worse news-

This week we're going to have to do basically no outside spending. The only money to be used this week is for my books...other than that we'll have to wait for mom's pay check. (And in reference to the cell phone bit, I know it seems selfish that I'm getting a new phone, but I'm actually paying for the phone out of my own pocket and Ma won't let me help out with anything...*conks her*)

Anyway...I'm being called to wash the dishes. :D

Baiiiiiiiii *huggles and love to all*

anti_war_song @ 2006-08-10T00:09:00

2006-08-10T05:45:24Z

Bored. It's late. My dad's cutting moulding and I'd give anything to take that fucking saw and chop his head in half.

I want to sleep.

He should go to sleep. I bet he's going to cut his fucking hand off because he's so tired.

Yeah. Ugh.

I got my Deadsy back. And my Orgy music. And I have a long ways to go before I get my musical library back to its previous state last August.

I have a LONG way to go....;__;

Anywho....Yeah.

I've been feeling relatively shitty since last Monday...yeah.

Last Monday I saw Matt when we went to Chevy's for my cousin's birthday. Okay, I've liked this boy for about two years and gave up on any chance be with him because I found someone that was readily there and I felt totally unadequate. This boy is fucking perfect... Yeah. I regret that totally...I could have had this perfect boy- polite, sweet, he listens to what I have to say, and he's affectionate. I turn around in my seat and see him looking at me and it makes me want to cry. Just seeing him makes me sad. I sat there the whole time, willing myself not to cry. Usually I only cried AFTER I had seen him. I usually get over it after a few hours of wallowing and crying, but this continued for two. Whole. Days.

Yeah...Pathetic.

But anyway...

I need to vent.

I cried. HARD. From the time I left that place and he hugged me goodbye until I went to sleep at three A.M. that morning. He kills me, I swear. And he has no idea.

I catch him looking at me sometimes and I have no idea why. Disgust, maybe? I have no clue...

It's kinda sick...I don't get to see him often but I'm just totally into him. It's just totally weird..."Absence makes the heart grow fonder" is put to a whole new meaning in this situation.

He's going to be a senior this year.

This school year will end and he'll go to college...and I'll still be in high school. It might be kinda hard to work things out if anything happens, which I highly doubt.

Anyway..survey stolen from Taylor. *hugs her*

Single or Taken: Single.
Happy about it? Not when I see Matt.
Sex: Female
Siblings: None. I have an unofficial sibling,

though.
Eye color: Green.
Shoe size: 9.5 or 10
Height: Five foot eight
Innie or Outie: Innie
Where do you live: Chalmette, LA
Righty or lefty: Lefty
Can you make a dollar in change right now?: Yup. It's in that huge-ass guitar purse in the corner, I think.
-----------------------------------------------------

---------------

FAVORITES.
Kind of pants: Pajama pantsss
Number: thirteen or eleven.
Animal: My black lab. :D
Drink: Bubble Tea XD
Alcohol: Hmmmmm Vodka, Pina Colada, or Daiquiris.
Sport: Bowling.
Month: Anything between October and February. Halloween, Thanksgiving, back into the swing of things at school, Christmas, New Years, Birthday, and Mardi Gras. One. After. The. Other. Life is so good....
Juice: Cranberry or orange. AH! Strawberry kiwi
Favorite cartoon character: Hatsuharu
-----------------------------------------

Have You Ever....

Given anyone a bathe: a little kid
Bungee Jumped?: Nah
Made yourself throw-up? yep. It made me feel better. Bad feeling in me stomach. Eck.
Gone skinny dipping?: NOPE. ^^
Eaten a dog?: Nooo ;___;
Put your tongue on a frozen pole?: Yeah. XD 'Twas fun until after I pulled it off...
Loved someone so much it made you cry?: I don't know if I love him but I like someone so much that he makes me cry after I see him.
Broken a bone: Nope. ^^
Played truth or dare: Yeah.
been a physical fight: yep
Been in a police car: no
Been on a plane: yea
Came close to dying: Yeah. =__=
Been in a sauna: No
Been in a hot tub: No lol
Swam in the ocean: Yahh
Fallen asleep in school: Once. *not so proud of it*
Broken someone's heart?: I doubt it.
Cried when someone died: Oh, ja.
Cried in school?: Yeah.
Fell off your chair: Mhmm..Laughing so hard at Tay-chan and the whole "FAILURE!" stamp thing. XD
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call? Yeah...Just my cell, though..And I really feel stupid for it.
Saved e-mails: yea
Made out with JUST a friend?: Never made out.
Used someone: Not that I know of.

-----------------------------------------------------

----------

What is...

Your good luck charm?: A necklace I got recently. Things have been pretty good since I got it.
What's your room like: Sparse.
What is beside you?: A pillow.
Last thing you ate?: Cane's.
What kind of shampoo do you use?: Tresemme

Ever Had...

Chicken pox: No
Sore Throat: Yea
Broken nose: No
-----------------------------------------------------

------

Do You...

Believe in love at first sight: No.
Long distant relationships: Not any more.
Like school: Yeah.
-----------------------------------------------------

---------

Question:

Who was the last person that called you: Dad
Who was the last person you slow danced with: Dat Tran XD At eighth grade graduation. *falls over laughing*
Who makes you smile: Funny stuff, friends, crack!conversations, people with a weird sense of humor.
Do you like filling these out: Yep ^^
Do you wear contact lenses or glasses? Both
Do you like yourself: Depends on how I'm

dressed...That's what my mood really depends on.
Do you get along with your family? Mhm.

----------------------------------------------------

Are You...

Obsessive? *sing-song voice* understatement of the centuryyy
Compulsive?: :D
Suicidal?: Same as Tay-chan. Homicidal.

----------------------------------------------

Final Questions:

What are you listening to right now?: Depeche Mode -

"Enjoy the Silence"
What did you do yesterday?: Worked.
Hated someone in your family: Let's just say I have a heavy personal vendetta against one.
Gotten any awards?: Bowling averages, Honors crap, scholarship crap, service awards, Academic Olympics, Presidential education award...blah...blah...
What car/truck do you wish u could get? PT Cruiser. XD OR A YARIS. <3
Where do you want to get married?: I don't know

yet...
Good driver?: Yeap....
Good Singer?: Depends on who's listening, I suppose.

I think I suck.
Have a lava lamp: Used to. Bright pink *cringe* WITH

GLITTER *gag*
How many remote controls are in your house?: Two. lol
Are you double jointed?: In a few of my

fingers...yeah...I know. XD Two of them on my right

hand and one on my left.
What do you dream about?: Total crack, I swear...but other times it gets bad. Caducus. I used to dream about a lot of macabre stuff...but it just gets worse progressively. *sigh*
When you last showered: This morning.
-----------------------------------------------------

-------

Either/or

Scary or Funny Movies: Funny. ^^ Scary is good, but it's just not scary. XD
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla! ^^
Rootbeer or Dr.Pepper: Dr.Pepper
Skiing or Boarding?: Boarding
Summer or winter?: Winter
Silver or Gold: Silver
Diamond or pearl: Diamond
Sprite or 7up: sprite
Coffee or tea: Coffee.
Phone or in person: in person
Are you oldest, middle, youngest: Only
Indoor or outdoor: Indoor
-----------------------------------------------------

-

Today did you...
1. Talk to someone you like: No...he's kinda far away

right now.
2. Buy something: No.
3. Get sick: No.
8. Talked to an ex: Not in a few months. Thank God. We've kinda excommunicated one another, actually. It's a good thing, at least for me. And definitely for him. lol He hates me. ^^ *v for victory*
9. Miss someone: Yeah.
________________________________________ ______

Last person who....

10. Slept in your bed: Dude I just got my bed two days ago. lol ME!
11. Saw/heard you cry? Me.
12. Made you cry: Matt.
13. Went to the movies with: Sheila.
14. You went to the mall with: Sheila.
15. Said "I Love You" and meant it: Today. On the phone to my mom.
________________________________________ __

16. Ever been in a fight with your pet? Play fights,

yeah. XD Dogs play by "fighting"...
17. Been to Vegas? Noo
18. Been to Mexico:Nooo
19. Been to the Bahamas: Nope
20. Been to Europe: Noppeee
________________________________________ __________

Random.....

21. Do you have a crush on someone right now?:

Yeah...And I don't think he'll know any time soon.

Where's 22,23,24? Inside my headphones playing beautiful music.

25. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: No.
26. What's under your bed: There is no "under" my bed

XD My bed is flat on the floor.
27. Favorite sports to watch: Hmm...Extreme Fighting.

That's awesome shit right there.
28. Favorite Locations: Japan. I wanna go....
29. Piercing/Tattoos: One in each year and a closed

lip ring. *sigh*
31. Who do you really hate?: My uncle. No one else.

He's the only person I'd truly wish death upon.
32. Do you have a job: Sorta.
33. Have u ever liked someone? Yeah. That's why I cry at night.
34. Have you had your first kiss? No.
35. Rock or rap? rock
36. Are you lonely right now? Yeah.
38. Song that's stuck in your head right now?: "The

Key to Gramercy Park" - Deadsy
39. Played strip poker? no
40. Have you ever gotten beat up?: No.
42. Have you ever been on radio/TV: Yeah. The whole behind-the-focus shit.
43. Have you ever been in a mosh-pit: Yeah. It made me want to hurt them all very, very badly.

Random

1. What color is your underwear right now?: Black.
2. Whats the first things you notice about the

opposite sex?: Attitude, eyes, hands, voice
3. have you drank?: Yea.
4. have you smoked? No. Don't plan on it, either.
5. Ever get so drunk you dont remember?: I don't get

drunk.
6. Hair color?: Currently brown. It might be half

black and half brown soon.
7. Are you too shy to ask someone out?: Yeah. Way

too shy.
8. Hugs or Kisses?: Hugs, I'd believe. It can be

done in public or in front of parents with no

worries. lol
9. You wear make-up?: Yeah. Very often...
10. Butter, Plain or Salted popcorn: Kettle corn. ^^
11. Dogs or cats?: Puppieesss
12. Favorite Flower? Lily. Tiger lily, actually.
13. Have you ever fired a gun?: Yeha.
14. Do you like to travel by plane as opposed to car?

Plane. I get fewer headaches.
15. How many pillows do you sleep with? 2
16. Who are you missing right now?: A few people.
17. Do you think your ex(s) or old best friends miss

you? Ex, no. Thank God. And old best friends..they've prolly forgotten me by now. My best friend currently has been my best friend for years now.

anti_war_song @ 2006-08-08T18:32:00

2006-08-08T23:40:49Z

Yeah...umm...lessee...I haven't posted in a while, have I? XDDDD;;;;

HEHEHEHEHEHHE....

I have moved into my room.

Yay. ^^ It's so pretty.

I swear...It's like something from a magazine....*____* Not a lot of furniture and lots of free space...and my bed isn't on a frame. It's just a headboard and my box spring and mattress. It looks nicer that way, I think...and it's a way to keep me from putting things under my bed..because it's impossible to put things under my bed. Harharharrrr XD

I'm getting my hair cut. Like Miyavi's. Oh, ja. I pwn.

I am going to try to talk my mom into letting me get black streaks in it.

I have orientation next Wednesday and I get to see my Little Buddy. :D

And I get to take my yearbook picture. I'm gonna get my hair cut by then or I'm gonna cry. Ugh.

Ummm

Yeah. XD

I haven't been online in a while. We've been really busy. We finished the flooring (except the threshholds) and moved the basic furniture into the bedrooms. We're currently putting the stove in the kitchen and have installed the pot filler and all that crap. One third of the house is currently finished being painted and there is still some minor moulding work and caulking left to do.

And I'm going to get a new cell phone soon.

Yeah. The one I have...the screen is cracked...Not just the outer screen cracked...but the crystal, too. So I can't see my screen. It's this blue-ish/purple tint at the moment. It's actually quite nice.

And with the acquisition of my Misfits makeup pouch to top everything off...I'm one happy little bitch, I tell you.

And I saw the new High-Intensity Pigments line from L'Oreal Paris...I want. I want. Very. Very. Badly.

I will either buy it or shoplift it. Either one is fine. It'll most likely be the latter of the two, though. Feh.

Seven bucks a piece. Fuck that shit.

At least it doesn't cost as much as MAC or Kryolan. Holy crap, that shit's expensive.

I go to Hot Topic and get the cheap stuff. As long as it has intense color, I'm fine.

I saw a palette on EBay that I'm itching to buy. Seriously. I was like "OMGOMGOMGOMG *pets screen* I vant...I vaaaaaaaaaanttttt *_____*)

Okay, I'm done. ^^

I have Vietnamese french bread for breakfasttttt. . . .Envy me. XP

2006-07-24T18:56:03Z

Ugh so good. =____< <-- (twitchy face of unbelievable-ness)

And diet Barq's root beer.
I hate root beer normally.
But I like it with bread. Or pizza.
Weird.

Not a balanced meal.

But fuck that.

NEWS ON THE HOUSE :D

My room is finished, save the floors and plates for outlets.

I have a closet that does not look like the doorway of impending doom.

I was like....WOAAHH. Because there was wood paneling in my closet immediately...then my dad let me gut out the wood and we put up the sheetrock. I got to float it :3 and now I have white walls in my closet. It doesn't look as dreary.

And now it looks nice and fresh and CLEEEEEEEEAN *hugs self*

Ah, my walls are green. We finished painting. The molding is up...I swear we have more molding in this house than all of the houses on our street combined. We put up crown molding, shoe molding, base molding, molding around doorframes....it all came with the house (it was built in the thirties) and we didn't want to get rid of it...I mean...It's gorgeous stuff, really...Just a pain in the ass to put up and angle..

The only things that have to be done in the rest of the house are the base molding in the den, painting the acoustic tiles in the foyer, final coats on a few of the walls, cutting in the blue walls for the kitchen, plates for outlets and switches, putting up fixtures, sanding the wood floors in the kitchen and foyer, refinishing them, and moving in. It's all cosmetic shit. I'm going to sleep in my room for the first time tonight.

I'm gonna have a fun time dancing around in my room to AFI songs and shit like that. Yeeeah.

I'll have walls.

That's what kills me.

Walls, people...fucking WALLS.

Fuck, I might bring the TV in there with my ps2 and just play KH2 all night.

I might pay for that in the morning but fuck that.

It'll be so worth it.

It'll be the first night this summer that I will be able to relate to as part of "Summer Vacation."

And Kristi's mom is doing okay, so I'm ecstatic at the moment.

Yay.

:D

*dances around* today is just full of wonderful things.....*could cry at the joy of it all*

I'm pretty happy at the moment.

I just read Host Club 1 again.

And I'm listening to Decemberunderground.

And talking to Kristi.

I get to go to band practice tonight.

My voice is back and I'm working on learning to sing the Decemberunderground album.

I can hit the notes in "Tell Me What You Want" by Zebra and I can match that guy's falsetto. I'm like "HUZZAH."

And my room is in the final stretch. And my parents' room. And the living room. And the foyer. And the kitchen. And the bathrooms. And I'm gonna explode.

XD

asoldfkja;dlfkjas;kfj;lsfkjd *spaz*

I want bubble tea.

Mango.

Yummeh.

But next time I shall pay for it because Kevin gave it to me for freeeee ;___; I was like "NOOO I WANNA PAY LEMME PAY" "IT'S ON THE HOUSE"

and his crazy little brother goes "What house, Kevin Tran?"

. . . and both of us made "wtfh" faces at him. And Kevin's mom was like :D the whole time. XD she's so awesome.

Next time I'm going to get curry >:3

OKAY

Ummmmm

I have to clean the trailer soon.

Bwaaaaaaaaaaa =___=

Still sleepy and it's two P.M. lol

D.J.'s band is playing on the thirtieth or the thirty-first...

And I saw Matt at A.E. when Sheila and I went to get Xavier's birthday present.

Boxers. Yah.

So Matt's like "Never expected to see you here."

And he hugs me.

"Try on a pair of jeans. Free movie passes!" and so Sheila goes and tries on jeans...and comes back with the movie passes.

I <3 that boy. lol

And I think the guy at Todd's gave me his cell number on a coupon. And instead of giving me one, he gave me three.

I was like "Thank you! *wink*"

I can't find my coupons. Fuck.

Btw- I never planned on calling. ^______________^

He mumbled. A lot.

And I have my eye on someone else fufufufufu

It won't happen, but hey- A GIRL CAN DREAM, RIGHT?!

RIIIGHT.

So I'm like "WHOOOHAAAA" at the moment.

Because "The Interview" came on and it's one of my favorite songs on this album.

I'm giddy. Yay.

XD

And I'm done now. ^__^

Kristi, you're going to love those songs...so purdy....@____@

Love Like Winter

2006-07-19T21:10:23Z

I don't know if anyone else will read this, but, Tay-chan, please read it. I think you might like it.

Title: Love Like Winter
Author: Kayce/anti_war_song/whatever else you wanna call me
Rating: G. No cursing, no innunendo, just a fairy tale spin on things.
Pairing: YooSu
A/N: I do not own DBSG or the song "Love Like Winter" by A.F.I., the inspiration for this fic. It's written for xhotarubi by request. <3 you, Kristi.

Title: Love Like Winter
Author: Kayce/anti_war_song/whatever else you wanna call me
Rating: G. No cursing, no innunendo, just a fairy tale spin on things.
Pairing: YooSu
A/N: I do not own DBSG or the song "Love Like Winter" by A.F.I., the inspiration for this fic. It's written for xhotarubi by request. <3 you, Kristi.

It was one of those things that no matter how hard one could or may try- it was unable to be classified nor identified, a thing like a season that can only be given a name, not an explanation. And with winter comes searing cold and death of the living, leading to a horrible tragedy that befell two young men that found love for the first and last time.

A love that could not be comprehended or ignored was shared by a young prince, a prince that ruled over the land of ice and frost, Junsu, and a traveller. Blonde hair and a fair complexion clashed with his warm brown eyes- the only source of warmth in the land he ruled over. He sat upon a throne of ice carved with intricate curves and tendrils that seemed to be melded into the stony grey wall behind it.

Junsu sat on his throne, watching over the area around him. Quiet- the same thing as usual. There were never any visitors to Junsu or his kingdom. But that day a young man appeared on the white road, exhaling plumes of smoky vapor as he briskly walked toward Junsu's throne. The man stood before the ice prince and looked down at the parcel in his hands. The colors this man held startled Junsu- rich blues, browns, and the natural blush of human flesh. He had messy brown hair, completely unlike Junsu's perfectly straight blonde, almost white, tresses. He had brown eyes that seemed so much warmer than his own and the blush upon his cheeks gave him an ethereal glow that Junsu couldn't match, even if he had tried. The man's uniform was blue with a red badge over the left breast, seemingly there to cover his heart. Junsu had never seen such colors in his entire lifetime. The monochromatic silver, white, and icy blue tones were all he had been accustomed to. Junsu's imagination couldn't wrap around the possibility that they had even existed- and part of him regretted his ignorance of the outside world. No amount of tutoring could teach him the actual worth of the hues he saw.

His attention shifted from the color to the man himself. He went down on bended knee and held the package out to Junsu, who took it from the traveller and put it in his lap, carefully removing the twine and paper to reveal four items that Junsu had only been told about.

Roses...?

Nothing could live in Junsu's kingdom except for bare trees and the people that inhabited it.

"Who are you?" Junsu asked, his quiet voice alarming the traveller.
"I am Park Yoochun...I've come to give these to you as a token of my admiration."

Junsu gasped and would have blushed if he were capable. Yoochun looked up to the prince from his position on the ground and stared at Junsu, his eyes falling upon the slightly purple-tinged rouge of the other boy's lips.

"Kim Junsu...I mean...My name is Kim Junsu."

Yoochun smiled and looked down, a slight pink appearing on his cheeks. The boy was too beautiful to be stared at for long periods of time. He was afraid he'd disappear like the snow did when spring came in the kingdom he came from. Something so beautiful couldn't be gazed upon forever...

"Surely there must be a payment I must give for such things...What do you wish for?"

Yoochun pondered for a minute and determined exactly what he wanted from Junsu.

"A kiss. Please, I beg of you...No matter how chaste- I just want one kiss."

Junsu smiled softly and beckoned Yoochun forward. His lips met Yoochun's and he brought a hand to the other man's cheek, flinching whn he felt the once warm skin become ice cold. He removed his lips from Yoochun as quickly as he had placed them upon him.

"Yoochun...?"

Junsu looked at the other man's face and felt crystals of ice tumble forth from his eyes.

Yoochun was dead.

He ran his fingers through the mess of brown waves and bit his lip. Yoochun's eyes were wide open and his lips were blue, the veins running through his face showing as if his skin were as translucent as the thinnest of paper. Junsu's parents walked up behind him and his mother rested a cold hand upon his shoulder.

"Junsu...I'm sorry...We didn't want to tell you..."

Junsu's expression fell and he let go of Yoochun, watching as the man fell onto the ice before his throne.

"I killed him..."
"Junsu, you didn't know."

Junsu sat back in his throne and let his tears fall, each of them freezing before they finally fell onto his royal garb.

Still the prince's sobs echo through the caves of ice in his kingdom and the civilians no longer cared. One love was found and then broken, created and destroyed by a single kiss.

It was a love like winter- a cold, bittersweet experience.

"Warn your warmth to turn away.
Here it's December every day.
Press your lips to the sculptures and surely you'll stay, for of sugar and ice-
I am made.

It's in the blood. It's in the blood.
I met my love before I was born.
He wanted love.
I taste of blood.
He bit my lip and drank my war from years before."

- A.F.I. - "Love Like Winter"

K :D

Hii

2006-07-19T16:39:43Z

Note: if you do not have FireFox the layout will be kinda screwy, kthx. ^__^

But in FireFox it looks very pretty. Thanks to Kristi. *tackles*

I'm addicted to the new AFI CD.

The music is just simply gorgeous....

I beat KH2 the other day and had a horrid spaz attack on a couple of friends, including NikNik. I apologize for the intense fangirling.

Ah, and I should post that fic, ne, Kristi?

Bai, people.

anti_war_song @ 2006-06-28T13:18:00

2006-06-28T18:28:37Z

:D

Tired.

Bored.

I NEED FANFICS TO READ.

And I need to write.

But I have to go now.

Time to pull molding off of a window.

Cool beans.

*waves*

anti_war_song @ 2006-06-24T11:29:00

2006-06-24T17:50:28Z

So yeeeeahhhhh

Bored

Tired.
BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH *shakes head like woah*

I read sin_river's rant about the a7x fandom.

Huge points.

But it makes me not want to write any more >_<

I don't write enough to really...like...Ugh I can't even fucking explain it.

Gah.

It's like "ummm....*shrinks away, completely and utterly ashamed of self*"

Because this girl is just fucking amazing with her writing.

Her writing is probably my favorite so far, besides whoever wrote "The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot." I should check and see if it's been updated...and "The Prince of Thieves"...Hmm....

If you're a member of fandom...Go look up "The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot." 'Tis AMAZING.

And if you want to read it and don't want to join, just let me know so I can save and send.

And I just realized I haven't worked on "Wrong Place, Wrong Time."

I think I'm going to just kill it.

*sigh*

I might finish up "Hotel California" some day soon...but I just hate writing anything lemony. 'Tis the shame and insecurity right there.

And I'm done for now.

Sleeeeepy...bah...

Listen up. Read. Repost. NOW, FUCKERS!!!

2006-06-24T16:16:51Z

The time Has come...

Dir en grey has already hit Television, with fuse.
Dir en grey has hit recognition on Billboard.
Dir en grey has hit the Hot topic scene with thier shirts.
Dir en grey ; As of May 16th, has hit the Market with their realease of Withering to Death (CD/DVD combo) into American music stores.

Now is the time we show them. Just what dir en grey is. Just how stealthily the largest sound to ever have reached America, has, like a plague, infected the hearts of people everywhere with the painful images Kyo sent us with his words. The ability to feel the pain he has, that we've all felt the same. The power to empathize even the cruelest event. Because you've already felt the pain. The pain in the words of Aint Afraid To Die. The words in Mushi. The screams released on child prey. and somehow feeling only the best joy from the dulcet tones of Jealous reverse, to the absolute disturbance of soul in the song Pink Killer. Now is the time to show how stupid american media has been for not having figured it out earlier. Now is the time to show how incredibly lucky Warcon records has just become. Now is the time indeed, my friends. Im sure, nearly all of you. And myself, already have Withering to Death. But thats not going to stop me from buying it at Lous records tomorrow.

Let's show them, How many people are willing to Overlook Pirating the music. when we are more than willing to buy it. For the band that is nearly Leading the name itself. Luna Sea is not going to become the big one to break world wide. It will be dir en grey. I'm sure of it. Let's show them just how much we care. This is a personal request , from me, to you who may be reading thing all the way to this point. Please buy withering to death. just in case you weren't planning to. Do you want dir en grey's american trip to be a huge failure? It's worth the poser fans. It's worth sellout hot topic merchandise. Original fans will still know and always know the truth. The songs BEFORE Clever Sleazoid. Die's real name. Kyo's real name. The bands Toshiya played in before he joined "Deathmask" later to become dir en grey. The Band La:Sadie's and its ... obviously HUGE connectino to dir en grey. Please let us be the ones to prove the band correct to venture into the American market. Let's show our Praise to dir en grey. Lets show our Support. the most powerful way we can. and thats to clear those stores of thier dir en grey faster than they can stock them. Show up for dir en grey. only dir en grey. Be extremely excited and a little pissed off it took so long to get into america. Have fun and show real pride.

Pass Vashuyasha's message if you must. Just make sure everyone knows that now is the time. Repost this to show every fan of jrock on your OWN friends list that this is how it's going down. Everyone. Even if you dont like dir en grey. someone on your friends list might. I want to see this at least a hundred times over. I will probly delete you from my friends list if you don't have the common courtesy to send this message for me. Fan pages hip hop fans actors anime fans gamers 1337 kids. Everyone. This is more important to me than you'll ever know.

Let's do this.

anti_war_song @ 2006-06-21T17:44:00

2006-06-21T22:51:24Z

It's raining like no other day this year.

My yard is flooded.

Yay.

Dad's tired.

I'm drained.

Mom's the only one in a remotely good mood.

But that was quickly ruined by dad.

Yay, Vati. Screw it up for me, why don't you?

*sigh*

I'm tempted to go to band practice to get away from mom.

She'll be complaining about him now.

But I'll be happy.

Because I'm listening to "un insomnia" and that's all that counts right now is that I've got good music.

Right?

Riiight.

I haven't worked on the site today.

I'm going to start writing some jrock fanfiction.

Nightmare.

Possibly Ni~Ya and Ruka.

And Hitsugi and Ni~ya.

I love Ni~ya.

But I love Hitsugi more and it'd be great to put such a shy guy with such a perv like Ni~ya. :D

I have a new objective now.

Start writing jrock fanfics. *makes note in head*

anti_war_song @ 2006-06-20T17:17:00

2006-06-20T22:18:45Z

I'm listening to "304 Goushitsu, Haha to Sakura"....and...

I'm not sure.

But it sounds like Kyo is crying.

And that just kills me.

;_;

End of journal.

Jrock web site layout. American rock fiction on it. Oh, goodness.

2006-06-20T19:42:48Z

My mind is frizzle-fried.

;_;

Too. Many. PROBLEMS.

I'm rusty with HTML.

I'm making a layout.

And I've tweaked it about twenty times.

So...FUCK TABLES. *gives tables the finger*

I hate tables.

Bleeaaaahhhhhhgggghhhh

Daisuke from Kagerou. <3
Schrei - Silent Romantic.

Oh...and I don't know what the fuck it's going to be yet.

I might just make it into a fic site.

Yeah.

That works.

It'll be weird to see a jrocker for the layout and nothing but A7X fics..but...When I finish that RukixAoi fic...I'll be able to justify that. A little bit. lol

Who knows.

I might write Tatsu/Yukke stuff or something *falls over laughing*

I'd love to see something with Daisuke and Kazu @_____@

Ah..And this is the mediocre fruit of my labor. <3

But I love it so....;_;

It's in your face, but you can't grab it

2006-06-17T03:09:02Z

Something about Gene's voice makes me really calm.

And I'm too addicted to Bullets and Octane.

Tay-chan, I'm e-mailing you what I've got for "Wrong Place, Wrong Time" in a few minutes. ^^

It hasn't gotten too far...There's some slash-osity to it, but not too much.

Once it's done I'm going to put it on a fic journal. <3

Schweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee <3

And...Tay-chan...I called j00....You didn't pick uppppp...So I'm going to be persistent.

And I'll call in another ten minutes or so.

It's already...like..ten o'clock. XD

anti_war_song @ 2006-06-15T19:09:00

2006-06-16T02:12:31Z

Well, I'm alive :D

And I'm listening to "Kiertaa Kehaa" by Uniklubi.

And I'm too lazy to get the little a's from the character map right now.

I've started writing a new fic.

"Wrong Place, Wrong Time"

That's what happens when I watch The Devil's Rejects three times in the course of one evening.

Lots of fun.

Kinda bored. And I really want to get some headway on this fic...so...yeah.

Kristi-I'm sorry for signing off on you earlier. I just got in from working on the house, so I might be on later.

And I hope you or Nhaca wins the contest <3

NikNik<33

Taylor- when you are out of school, CALL ME.

And....I'm....done. :D

anti_war_song @ 2006-05-20T22:19:00

2006-05-21T04:21:04Z

TAY-CHAN, THERE YOU GO. ^_^

WHEEHEHEHE GUESS WHAT THIS RETARD DID.

2006-05-11T02:49:20Z

Kayce's been wanting a lip piercing.

Right?

Right.

Kayce's parents would freak.

Right?

Right.

Kayce+earring backing+safety pin+free time=...

A piercing in the left side of Kayce's lip. WHEE.

Haahhahaah...

I happy. Like..woah.

I'm going to have to really reopen it on Friday though...

I'm not going to be able to buy the retainer, studs, and things of that sort until after school on Friday when I might possibly go to the mall with Sheila...so...Maybe she'll feel generous and get me a retainer >__>;;; jk. lol

Stolen from Tay-chan! XD This is late, huh?

2006-05-08T01:16:56Z

Avenged Sevenfold

Age You Started Listening: around 2002. Dude I was fucking ELEVEN!?!? O_O Heard the hype on the net and fell in love. XD
First Time You Saw Him/Her: January 25, 2005
First Song I Heard: "Streets"
Favorite Song Today: Hmm...I'd have to say..."The Wicked End" or "Radiant Eclipse"
Least Favorite Song: "Warmness on the Soul" THE TITLE EXPLAINS ALL.
Favorite Album/Boxed Set/etc: Waking the Fallen
Memory(ies): Seeing them at the HoB for my bday and my dad asking if Zacky was gay. Crying from when they walked onstage until "Chapter Four" ended. Crying through "I Won't See You Tonight." Getting a smile from Brian.

CKY

Age You Started Listening: 14
First Time You Saw Him/Her: January 25, 2006
First Song I Heard: "Lost in a Contraption"
Favorite Song Today: "Sporadic Movement" or "Escape From Hellview"
Least Favorite Song: "Lost in a Contraption"
Favorite Album/Boxed Set/etc: Infiltrate.Destroy.Rebuild
Memory(ies): Deron said hello to me and I died. End of story. :D

The Misfits

Age You Started Listening: 7 XD I love you, daddy <3
First Time You Saw Him/Her: ;__; never...
First Song I Heard: "Some Kinda Hate"
Favorite Song Today: "Some Kinda Hate" "Last Carress" or "This Magic Moment"
Favorite Album/Boxed Set/etc.: Project 1950 and Famous Monsters
Memories: My dad telling me "Listen to this. The musicianship is horrible!"...and me telling him "But daddy I like them." and he just sighed and left the room while I listened and tried to pick out the words XD He must've heard that song about ten times before he told me to shut it off.

Miyavi

Age You Started Listening: 13
First Time You Saw Him/Her: ;___; never..he's in Japan...
First Song I Heard: "Coo Quack Cluck Ku Ku Ru"
Favorite Song Today: "Ippiki Ookami Ron" or "Pop Is Dead"
Least Favorite Song: "Coin Lockers Baby"
Favorite Album/Boxed Set/etc: Galyuu
Memories: Looking through stuff on Due le Quartz, being sad that they disbanded, and finding out that Miyabi went solo and started his carer as Miyavi. So I went and downloaded everything I could XD

Gazette

Age You Started Listening: 13
First Time You Saw Him/Her: Never...in Japan.
First Song I Heard: "[DIS]"
Favorite Song Today: "Katherine in the Trunk" and "Last Bouquet"
Least Favorite Song: "Sumire"
Favorite Album/Boxed Set/etc: Disorder or Madara.
Memories: Seeing Aoi for the first time and thinking "omgomgomgomg*petpetpet*" XD

Dude...like...woah.

2006-04-23T01:01:32Z

My dad and I were talking on the ride home yesterday.

Turns out Yngwie Malmsteen is coming to the HoB.

So my dad's like "REALLY?!? WE'RE GONNA GO! If it's less than seventy bucks for both of us to go."

So my thoughts are "FUCKYESFUCKYES!!!"

Yay.

I'ma see Yngwie Malmsteen so I'm gonna start counting down the days. CAN I GET A WOOP WOOP!?!?!...

Maybe not. XD

He's coming in June...and I'm like YAY.

:D

And there's like...this ad next to my box that I'm typing in and I WANT HER SHOES. I have shoes like them but they don't have a pointed toe and they're a bit flatter...They're from Nine West and I got 'em for ten bucks for a dance that I didn't even go to.

But they totally kick ass with my jeans. lol

I have to re-do my jacket ;____; It's gonna take a while but it's gonna be so much fun...so this is what I need...(this is more of a mental note)

A shitload of sharpies.
White paint pen.
Black ribbons.
Lace.
D-rings.
Straps.
Super glue. lol

Ok I'm done. :D

AND IM GOING TO MY OLD NAZI SCHOOL TOMORROW FOR A FAIR <3

Ok, I'm done.

...again....I live? Emo-ish problem list. Beware.

2006-04-07T05:19:49Z

All right.
My list.

And holy crap this is going to sound SO emo, so if you can't stand emo-y-ness.....beware. *sigh*

1. I fell off the wagon with my problems and I've started sorting myself out. They've already started going away so I'm doing a lot better with it. Next time it'll be even easier to deal with. I hadn't done it in a year but it all kinda caught up and the itch wouldn't go away...so...I dealt with it. And now I have X's on my neck, stomach, arms, back, and over my heart that are starting to disappear, thank God. It's a good thing I don't go too deep. Feel the itch, deal with the itch, regret dealing with the itch, cover up like a fucking rape victim. It's a vicious cycle.

And it's a wonder my parents and counselor haven't noticed.

2. Dad's asshole-ness has escalated to a new peak. I shall leave it all at that.

3. My mother's about ready to be admitted into an asylum.

4. Thoughts have gone morbid again and I can't even draw anything happy. It's all kinda freakish and demented and I want that to stop.

5. I flat-out CANNOT focus on ANYTHING important and it's driving me utterly mad.

6. (not so serious list item) Rally is tomorrow night and my throat is hurting like woah.

7. I haven't listened to music in too long and it's starting to show. In an extremely bad way.

8. The family is at it. Again.

9. My aunt is driving thoughts about my father (yeah, he's an asshole at times but I love the man so much) into my grandfather's head and he only talks shit while I'm around. It takes all of my self control not to fucking kill him. I'm extremely protective of my father.

ON A GOOD NOTE.

GREAT NOTE.

AWESOME NOTE.

I have been deemed aunt of my cousin's baby. She's due in November <3 *huggles Kelly* Congrats to Kelly and George *clapclap*

END.

I live :D

2006-03-31T03:48:39Z

I am, in fact, alive. Woah.

^______________^

Well, two new fic ideas.

Problem is I have to finish two and flesh out one.

I have another in progress with another project.

Six Feet Under Project and the Dead Letters Project.

Both are gonna be hella long.

And two more just slipped into my head from listening to "Slip Out the Back" and "Where'd You Go?". Damn.

I wrote a YooSu fic on Hug. omg. Woah.

People were like "I'll stalk you!"

I'm like O_O NO WAAAAAAAAAAY

My writings are deroded pieces of crap.

But thanks to Kristi it came out decent. *tackleness of the krist*

Omg, Niki. ELIZABETH. THAT FUCKING WHORE. UGH.

Z and Bri need some makeup sex, I think. Even though it would totally ruin the plot.

*sigh* I'm so impatient.

And I read "Hell In High Heels." I'm dead. XD

Ummmm

Nothing new on any other front.

Just...major boredom. Too much writing during class...

And....too much homework. Yeah. That about sums it up.